What LGBTQIA+ couples should look for in a wedding vendor

Every couple deserves a day that feels authentically theirs. But even in 2025, navigating the wedding industry as an LGBTQIA+ couple can come with challenges.

From constantly having to come out to suppliers, to being ghosted when you announce it’s an LGBTQIA+ wedding, what should be a joyful journey can all too often become a source of anxiety.

Choosing the right wedding vendor isn’t just about picking someone who can deliver. It’s about finding:

• A celebrant who doesn’t call you “man and wife” because they know language matters
• A clothing designer who makes you lace-lined wedding suits so you can both bust a move on the dance floor
• A jeweller who won’t ask, “Who’s the bride?” because they know love doesn’t come with labels

Here’s how to choose a wedding vendor that aligns with your values (and the red flags to look out for).

Inclusive language is key

Words matter. Vendors who use inclusive language in their communication, contracts and marketing create a welcoming experience for all couples. Look for signs like:

• Forms that have the option of including your pronouns
• Gender-neutral terms eg. “Person of Honour” instead of “Maid of Honour” or “wedding party” instead of “bridal party”
• Inclusivity statements, which may be on a dedicated webpage, in the footer or woven throughout the site
• Contracts that use terms like “Partner A” and “Partner B” rather than “Bride” and Groom”
• Staff or founders who include pronouns in their bios and email signatures

Keep in mind that terms like “gay wedding”, “lesbian wedding” or “same-sex wedding” can exclude some LGBTQIA+ couples. The most inclusive vendors avoid using these phrases as general terms, reserving them only in reference to couples who specifically identify with them.

Representation matters

Representation sends a clear message: "You belong here".

It’s not just about seeing diversity. It’s about feeling celebrated and valued. Start by exploring a vendor’s website, social media and portfolio. Do you see gay, lesbian, non-binary, trans and other LGBTQIA+ couples featured prominently and authentically? This could be in imagery of real couples, testimonials from past customers or blog posts sharing a range of customer stories.

Keep an eye out for inauthentic representation. This may look like:

• Stock photos of LGBTQIA+ couples
• Hired models in shoots that feel performative or overly staged
• A single token example in a portfolio full of heteronormative weddings
• Only showcasing LGBTQIA+ weddings during Pride Month

Authentic representation goes beyond optics. It reflects a vendor’s true commitment to celebrating all love stories. When you see couples like you reflected in their work, it’s a good indication they’ll approach your wedding with the same care and respect.

Finding LGBTQIA+ inclusive wedding vendors that celebrate you

While traditional wedding directories and resources might be the go-to for many couples, they’re not always designed with LGBTQIA+ couples in mind. These directories may accept any vendor willing to pay for placement, rather than showcasing suppliers that have been vetted based on values.

Instead, focus on platforms that prioritise inclusivity and highlight vendors who genuinely support and celebrate all relationships. Here’s how to start your search:

• LGBTQIA+ wedding directories: Explore curated directories on websites like Dancing With Her, Dancing With Them and Equally Wed. These platforms list vendors who are committed to inclusivity and actively celebrate diverse love stories. Other publications, like Rock n Roll Bride, Hello May and Polka Dot Wedding aren’t LGBTQIA+ specific, but are committed to representing a diverse range of couples.
• Social media: Search hashtags like #LGBTwedding, #QueerWedding or #LesbianWedding to discover vendors showcasing their work. Look for authentic representation and thoughtful captions that celebrate inclusive love stories.
• Recommendations: Reach out to friends and local LGBTQIA+ community groups to ask for referrals. Personal recommendations can lead you to vendors that have already received the stamp of approval from like-minded couples.
• Vendor networks: If you’ve already found a photographer or celebrant you love, ask if they can recommend other vendors they’ve worked with who share their values.
• Reviews and testimonials: Read testimonials from LGBTQIA+ couples to see how the vendor has supported and celebrated others in the community.

Once you’ve identified potential vendors, vet them by asking questions like:

• “Can you share examples of LGBTQIA+ weddings you’ve worked on?”
• “How do you make sure your services feel welcoming for us and our guests?”
• “Can we personalise the script or signage to better reflect us?”
• “What are your options for gender-neutral engagement rings and wedding bands?”

The vendors you choose should make you feel seen, valued and celebrated at every step of your journey. Because your wedding isn’t just a day. It’s a reflection of your love and everything that makes it extraordinary.

A quick note: We acknowledge that many of our engagement and wedding ring designs so far have been for lesbian couples and those who present as lesbian couples. As a result, many of the images we share represent this part of the LGBTQIA+ community. We're committed to better reflecting the richness of all LGBTQIA+ love stories in our work. If you're looking for a space for your love story to shine, we’d love to connect with you.

Red flags to look out for

While many vendors genuinely strive to be inclusive, some practices can miss the mark. Keep an eye out for these red flags:

• A lack of diversity in images and testimonials
• Assuming that you'll follow traditions like “walking the bride down the aisle” or defaulting to “his and hers” when discussing wedding details
• Staff who appear uncomfortable or dismissive when addressing inclusivity
• Tokenism, where vendors include LGBTQIA+ couples in their marketing just to check a box

By staying aware of these red flags, you can better identify vendors who may not create the supportive environment you deserve. Prioritise working with those who make you feel respected, valued and celebrated.

A note on advocacy

If you come across a wedding vendor who seems promising but hasn’t fully embraced inclusive practices, it’s okay to advocate for change. Sometimes, a respectful conversation can help a vendor grow.

At the same time, it’s not your responsibility to educate. If you feel that speaking up will negatively impact your wedding planning experience, save your energy for inclusive wedding suppliers who are already taking steps to create safe and affirming spaces.

Final thoughts

Your wedding day is about celebrating your love. The right vendor won’t just respect your identity. They’ll enthusiastically embrace it.

They’ll listen to your request for a dual proposal, a non-traditional aisle entrance or a ceremony script that avoids gendered language. They’ll be excited to help you create a first dance moment with both your parents, welcome your mixed-gender wedding party and organise a ceremony that honours your chosen family.

They’ll prioritise your individuality and never try to enforce rigid, outdated traditions because that's just "how it’s done”.

It’s worth putting in the work to find vendors who truly get you. We’re here to help with gender-neutral, LGBTQIA+ friendly engagement and wedding rings that tell your story. Book a consult to get started.

This article has been written with the guidance of Dancing With Her’s How to Be an LGBTQ+ Inclusive Wedding Pro course, designed to help businesses become the inclusive wedding vendor every couple deserves.